Turbulence

Still feeling ups and downs, mostly downs.

I don't know why I am still holding on to that tiny little bit of hope, knowing damn well that it is over.

I want to tell her how I feel. At the same time, it is probably too late. Telling her now will not do any good. It feels horrible to love someone and no one knows about it. I am not talking about infatuation or crush. Real love. I have experience moment of a lifetime. Something I don't want to lose, especially a person to someone else. She is limited edition and I want her.

I want her in my life forever. However, not as a friend.. not like this right now. I need some space to think. I have put in too much time and heart and feelings into this to be friends. I just can't do it.

However, there are still so much I need to do before that... Maybe, we weren't meant to be. I don't deserve someone so great. If I do, I'll be the luckiest person in the world.

For now, I can only sit in my room and think back the past. Hopefully one day, I can relive the good memories with the same person.